Does anyone remember Major Mudd (Greater Boston)?

Long before the Boston Red Sox reversed the curse, when I was in the 4th grade, I met my first television personality, Major Mudd . It was down at the South Shore Plaza in Braintree, MA. He had a weekday morning cartoon show, including a serialized non-cartoon about two brothers traveling down a river and going back in time.

We remember you well, Major Mudd.

A Valuable Summer Job

It is because of my summer job long-ago at September Farm of Rye, NH that this afternoon I was able to lug a 50lb bag of wild bird sunflower seed out to the car.

A very nice clerk offered twice to provide help, but having once hefted bails of hay and bags of Purina Oats and Omolene for the horses, I was able to take it out to the car ,and my back is fine.

So, thanks, September Farm. Although after mucking out the stalls, I needed to — as the late Moe Howard would say shower and use cologne — working there gave me good hoisting strength.

A Glimpse Of My Youth

For the most part, the Gary Larson Non-Working Breeds cartoon applies to me. It shows a husband and wife dog couple. The husband is sitting in front of a television in a T shirt. The wife has come in from the kitchen, and is glaring at the husband, who answers her glare with “Hey, Look, You Knew When You Married Me that I was a Non-Working Breed”.

Perhaps the only exceptions to this is when we entertain our friends and riding my bicycle. Getting my driver’s license was probably the worst thing I ever did. Before being able to drive, I rode by bicycle a lot. Physical fitness-wise, everything seemed to go downhill after getting my license.

For about a decade, I have ridden my bicycle to work, and although I don’t work that far away, riding my bicycle for the first few years was drudgery. Lately, while riding, it almost seems like I’m young again. I’m not an exercise enthusiast, and don’t have to be on my bicycle every minute of the day, but riding more seems to make riding more better.

I sometimes think it is because my 23-year-old Giant Rincon hybrid bicycle was overhauled last year. Overhauling the hubs and cleaning the drive train probably helps riding by reducing friction and making shifting smoother, but probably it’s due to my wanting to ride and building up some stamina. I will enjoy it while it lasts.

Do you know where your chocolates are?

Many years ago, I got to announce news and run the [radio] board for the Paul Parent Garden Club at WBOQ 104.9 FM. Paul Parent has a syndicated radio show that runs on Sunday mornings. When you work at a radio station, you sometimes get to voice spots (radio commercials). So here is one of mine for one of my favorite places, Turtle Alley Chocolates in Gloucester.

Frank’s Cough

Many years ago when I worked in a software company west of Boston, I worked with a product manager named Frank. Frank helped me navigate my new company, had an excellent sense of humor, and I am forever grateful to him for his wisdom and friendship.

When I first started, Frank sat in a cube next to mine, and he had a really serious cough. At the time, I was still working at WBOQ 104.5 FM Gloucester, and decided I would write him a funny spot (radio advertisement). The copy and cough are mine, but I needed a real voice talent, sportscaster J. P. Lewis.

Mrs. Highpants, who is a fan of James Horner, suggested we use the main title theme to Zorro, and the rest, as they say, is history.

So, here is “Frank’s Cough”.

With Apologies To Pee Wee King, Chilton Price, and Redd Stewart

I’m responsible for the software that keeps track of our town’s collections, water, real-estate, and motor vehicle excise bills, as well as parking tickets, and most recently assumed co-responsibility for printing the bills as well, so re-purposing The Duprees’ You Belong To Me made sense.

See the water bills along the Nile

Parking tickets step out in style and

Real-estate payments begin to smile ’cause

They belong to me.

Excise service warrants wet with rain

You owe a bundle, and that’s a shame

But pay your bill on time to avoid the pain and

They belong to me

I’m still working on the rest of the lyrics. I find it helpful to bring a positive attitude to work.

And here is the original.